Me: Fabian it's so nice of you to drop by and spend some time with us today.
Fabian: No problem. Heard about your torn ACL and all. Thought I'd see how you were doing.
Me: That's awfully nice of you.
Fabian: So when are you going under the knife?
Me: Wednesday or Thursday. I'm picking between three surgeons. My biggest qualm is finding a surgeon who will actually be operating on my knee and not just over seeing a fellow do it. I don't want anyone learning how to reconstruct an ACL on my knee! And even if the surgeon says he's going to do the surgery, how do I know that he's telling the truth? How is the fellow supposed to learn if he never gets to practice on unsuspecting patients like myself?
Fabian: Dude, your knee is much too important to just practice on. If you want, I can slip inside the OR, under the radar of course, and make sure they're doing things right.
Me: And if they aren't doing things right, what are you going to do?
Fabian: Clobber him over the head with a bed pan.
Me: Hmmm... that does sound enticing. I'll get back to you on that. Well, enough about me. What's going on with you?
Fabian: Just trying to stay out of trouble.
Me: What kind of trouble?
Fabian: Oh you know, just staying out of the way of dueling factions trying to change the world as we know it. Keeping it low key.
Me: I see. Well, when you're trying to stay low key what do you do in your spare time.
Fabian: Play guitar.
Me: Oh, so you're a rocker?
Fabian: Nah, more classical, improv stuff. Making my own crap up.
Me: Yes, making your own crap is important.
Fabian: You playing with me?
Me: Never. (Fabian glares at me) So... how do you like it in Alabama? I mean it's no London or Italy.
Fabian: It's quaint. Except for the fact that these girls keep following me around. They're squealing after me like I'm some piece of meat.
Me: Really?
Fabian: Yeah, they think I'm some actor. One girl called me Ben Barnes.
Me: Yeah, you do look like him.
Fabian: Who's Ben Barnes?
Me: You know, the guy that plays Prince Caspian in the Narnia Movie.
Me: What movies do you like watching?
Fabian: I think the last American film I saw was that Button movie.
Me: You mean, the Curious Case of Benjamin Button with Brad Pitt?
Fabian: Yeah, that was based on a true story.
Me: No it wasn't.
Fabian: Yeah, it was. There was a guy in Scotland who was was born an old man and got younger as he aged. Scots tried to keep it real hush hush.
Me: Really?
Fabian: No! Are you sure you just tore your ACL and not something in your brain too?
Me: Ha Ha. Very Funny. And on that note, I think we should bring this time with Fabian to a close. Thank you Fabian for charming our readers.
Fabian: My pleasure. Take care and stop being so damn gullible.
Me: Right. I'll try my best.
So sorry about your ACL - don't know what that is but it sounds bad. Hope your surgery goes well. Good thing you have Fabian to look out for you.
ReplyDeleteHow'd the surgery go? Hope the meds aren't making you too loopy (though guess that's better than too pained).
ReplyDelete