This weekend I am going to be wedding dress shopping in Atlanta. I think it's a girl thing--that from childhood we dream about what that special day of shopping is going to be like. The sun will be shining. The racks of dresses will literally sparkle, beckoning me to try them on, and when I do, the sun will shine extra brighter, and the birds will burst into song, and I'll twirl around the store while the sales lady and my family and friends look on with clasped hands and smiles.
This is what's really going to happen:
The sun is not shining. It is overcast and cold.
I'm going to stumble in with a box of kleenexes pressed to my chest. The dresses will still sparkle, but they'll make my already swollen eyes water, which will then set off a sneezing attack. I'll reach for a tissue, but not be able to grab one in time, and accidentally send mucous flying onto one of the pristine dresses. The store owner will get upset and kick me out.
Oh, and one of the bridesmaids is pretty pregnant, so I'm going to maintain a twenty five foot distance from her the entire weekend, because she and baby do not need this cold. So we'll be at the store, and I'll be modeling the latest dress, and I'll have to yell across the store, "So what do you think?" And she'll just have to give me a thumbs up or thumbs down because if she tried to comment I probably wouldn't be able to hear because I'm so congested and my ears are stopped up.
Yup, that's what's going to happen.
You're probably asking why must I go shopping this weekend?
Well, it's been planned for months. Bridesmaids are flying and driving in. Parents are coming. And this is literally the only weekend between now and the end of the year that I actually have time to do this--what with the ice show and work stuff.
So...yeah...wish me luck!